Soundtrack of Truth

I’ve said it before, one of the most difficult aspects of heartache is the feeling of being singled out. Being the only one. There is the rest of the world and there is you. On Saturday mornings, families head off to soccer games, cookouts and birthday parties, and you spend another day in isolation. You are staring out of a hospital window or facing another long day at home unable to venture out because of the needs of the precious one who binds you. Other families chatter about their concerns, why their child is going through a sleep regression or how they’re going to “make it through” the terrible twos. You spend your days wondering if you will ever hear your nonverbal child speak. Your days are not their days. Your concerns are not their concerns. You live in a different world; and at times, the distinction can be grating. Whether we like it or not, the eternal pull will always be toward self-pity. How can it not? When you calculate the number of days you have gone without getting a full night’s sleep, when you add up the hours you have spent at doctor’s appointments or in therapy sessions, or when you daily live with the reality that it can all be gone in a moment, how can you not live beneath the cloud of self-pity? It is simply natural.  

Overcoming What is Natural

And yet, I will once more assert that what is natural is not always right. What is natural is not always good. More to the point, what is natural can be overcome. You see, self-pity destroys. It kills joy. It suffocates peace. Left unchecked it leads step-by-step down the corridors towards bitterness, and bitterness is a place no follower of Jesus Christ should dwell.  

The reality is that when Jesus came offering life “more abundant,” He wasn’t merely making an offer to those whose lives were “normal.” He wasn’t just offering peace and joy to those untouched by the sorrows of life. His offer was universal. It was to you. Christ came to bring life, hope, and healing to those who suffer and His power to do so was not limited. There is no pain too great, no sorrow too deep to overwhelm Christ’s ability to triumph over it. While self-pity may be natural when life is difficult, the believer is called to a life of triumphant joy.  

Not Merely Words

Now before you scroll away thinking this is just empty Christianese platitudes that have nothing to do with your sleep-deprived, grief-ridden world, please take a moment to hear me out.  

Self-pity comes from viewing our lives through the lens of the world. Seeing ourselves and our sorrows only at the surface level. Viewing life this way is almost like watching a movie without sound. The action is one hundred percent the same whether the sound is on or not, but the impact of the movie completely changes when you turn up the volume. Sound transforms a movie. Just as spiritual truth transforms the way you view your life.  

Called to This

For example, self-pity says, “This is so unfair… I don’t know another mom that has to ______. I can’t believe this is my life.” You see your life, and it is all true. You are facing things most mothers never have to face. Things do appear to be unfair. You are exhausted, and you want to know why. Why does your life have to be so different from everyone else’s? Now, allow me to turn on the volume—let us view your life while the sound of spiritual truth plays. Because, whether you know it or not, the story you are living is not a story that has unfolded by chance. You do not suffer because of the mistakes someone has made. You do not suffer because of an accident or an unfortunate genetic mutation. Christian, your story was written before the foundations of the earth. God chose you to be you—the mother of this child. Your child was “knit together,” unseen by the world, but preciously and deliberately formed by the hand of God (Ps. 139:13-14). This is your assignment. You have been chosen by God. Singled out, yes, singled out by God for an assignment that is unique. Through you, God intends to reveal to the world an image of His love. A love that can stretch to great length, endure great sorrow and will hold steadfast forever. Hear the soundtrack: You were called to this.  

Prepared for This

But off goes the volume, and self-pity murmurs, “This is too hard of a calling—why me? I literally cannot go on another day… it is all too much.” And it makes sense; this is a hard calling. Your body bears record—there are physical and emotional scars. You are worn, physically broken by lack of sleep and the physical demands of being a full-time care giver. You are emotionally weary from days, months, years of being “on alert,” managing symptoms, and navigating challenges. And you look ahead and see no end in sight. And yet, slowly, let us turn up the volume of the soundtrack of truth: the truth is that God is far too wise, too mighty and too good to give you an assignment for which He has not prepared you and for which He will not help you. Whether you believe it or not, like Esther, you were born, “for such a time as this.” Do you think that the God that assigns animals to arctic regions and clothes them with fur, hasn’t also uniquely designed you for the hardships you will face? He will surely “make your feet like the feet of a deer,” sure and steady, prior to setting you “in high places” (Ps. 18:33). No, your world is not the world of the average parent, but you have not been made to live the life of an average parent. God has been preparing you and will continue to prepare you for the days ahead. He is your Shepherd. He knows how to lead you to “still waters” when there is a need for quiet rest. He knows how to “prepare a table for you” even in the “presence of your enemies.” What is there to trouble you? Your God not only “goes before you but will be with you” (Deut. 31:8). There is no cruelty in our God. While He has given you a difficult task, He doesn’t intend for you to fulfill it on your own. Yes, you must labor—even to the point of exhaustion–but do not for one moment think you are laboring unseen and alone. Believer, you have a Heavenly Father by your side. He will keep every night vigil with you “He neither slumbers nor sleeps” (Ps. 121:4). He will guide you with His counsel and one day receive you to glory (Ps. 73:24). There will be songs in the night. There will be a fellowship in suffering. Listen to the soundtrack: You are called to this and made for this.  

A Sign and a Wonder

Almost defeated, self-pity whispers… “But what’s the point… everyone else gets to do big things, important things. My work is never done, and no one ever sees it. I used to have dreams of doing great things and now I am invisible.” With a rush of final grandeur, the spiritual reality chorus builds to a crescendo: Don’t you see? Do you not realize the picture your life creates—you are a living witness—a sign and a wonder to a watching world. Oh, it won’t always be grand or dramatic, but through you God intends to teach, to demonstrate, to bring glory. It may appear that no one is watching, no one sees; but you can be sure that through you the world will see the power of God working through weakness. Through you, they will see a joy that has no earthly source. God has called to represent Himself to a world that often needs tangible lessons of invisible realities. You have been chosen to teach the mysteries of God through the way you rise each morning and lay down your life in service of another. Your life is a picture of the cross, a picture of love. When you embrace it, God is glorified. Do you see it?  

Receive the Blessing  

Oh, friend, do not pity yourself. God made no mistake in creating the world in which you live. You have been called to it, prepared for it and will receive His blessing within it. Jesus said without apology, “Blessed are they that mourn for they will be comforted” (Matt. 5:4). While you have been singled out for a unique sorrow, you have also been singled out for a unique joy as well. You will receive comfort from the hands of God. What need have you for pity? View your life only with the soundtrack of truth playing. There is work to be done, and you were made for it, prepared for it and will find God’s greatest blessing in it. May God bless you, my friends.

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